I Quit Drinking!

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This is something that I have tried in the past, and I always gave in. I would shoot for 30 days and would talk myself out of it pretty quickly. Friends would say, “What is the big deal?  It is only one drink a day. Just enjoy it.”
As I have gotten older, I was having more and more issues with it. I tried my best to deny it. How could one drink a night be a problem? This summer, I was having a lot of anxiety. I wasn’t sleeping well.  I was waking up in a panic. I was also feeling very agitated during the day.  For years, I have been listening to different podcasts about the effects of alcohol. I finally felt like I needed to give this up. On Tuesday, September 9th, I decided to not drink that night. You know what they say, One day at a time. I got through that and I decided to keep going. I am now on Day 55 and I am giving it 6 months. I knew if I negotiated with myself, just drink on weekends etc., that it would just creep right back in. 
I made a video on Day 44 that goes through this deeper. It ends with a great mocktail recipe that has helped me so much. 
Do you have issues with alcohol? It feels like so many of my friends have struggled with it. 

I could go on but that feels like enough for now.

Love,

Mary

I made a sweater!

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Creativity was my word for 2025. I like my creativity to be functional, so I decided to start knitting. I first made a scarf and then went on to a sweater. The woman at the knitting store tried to encourage me to make a hat after the scarf. I told her I really wanted to make a sweater.

My friend Wendy is an excellent knitter and I knew she would help me through the hard parts. I also attend the library knitting circle when I can. It is a new sit down activity for me. Some days, I can’t believe I am in the library knitting and talking about pie. I really enjoy it. It has been great to meet new people. You just sit there. You don’t need to eat or drink. You don’t need to talk if you don’t want to. You sit and knit and 5 months later you have a new sweater! The ladies are so supportive and everyone tells you how much they love your sweater. Knitters are very nice people.

On to my next sweater!

Love,

Mary

Cucumber, Tomatoes and Wild Arugula

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I have a small backyard with an even smaller vegetable and herb garden. It doesn’t get a lot of sunlight, so I plant vegetables in little areas that receive more sun. I stuck 2 cherry tomato plants in the side yard in between a limelight hydrangea and a laurel bush. On the other side of the yard, I have a few cucumber plants growing in a cage. They are planted in between a quick fire hydrangea and sedum. Everyday, I am able to pick a few tomatoes and a cucumber. I love sharing the small excess with friends and my Mom. “Here Mom, I grew you a cucumber!”

Gardening and sharing the bounty is a wonderful way to elevate your spirits and stay grounded.

Love,

Mary

Creativity

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I have decided my word for the year is creativity.

I started knitting again. I haven’t knitted since college. Back in the day, I was low on funds. I decided to knit hats for Christmas gifts. This time, I thought I would really like to knit a sweater. I went to Mother’s Knitters in Red Bank with my friend, Anne. I decided a sweater was a bit ambitious and it would be best to start with a scarf. I am making it for myself! Dante at the store suggested a super merino wool and told me to go with a light color. Apparently, you can see your mistakes easier with a light color. Anne got me started and now I am about 2 feet in. I am really enjoying it. I knit in the evening during Jeopardy and Wheel of Fortune. It is not just straight knitting either. Every row has a knit purl section to it. When I make a mistake, I go to You Tube to learn how to fix it. Thank you You Tube. Next, I will knit a sweater!

I told my therapist that I started knitting again and she sent me this quote from a Native American woman.

“Grandma how do you deal with pain?” “With your hands, dear. When you do it with your mind, the pain hardens even more.” “With your hands, grandma?” “Yes, yes. Our hands are the antennas of our Soul. When you move them by sewing, cooking, painting, touching the earth or sinking them into the earth, they send signals of caring to the deepest part of you and your Soul calms down. This way she doesn’t have to send pain anymore to show it. “Are hands really that important?” “Yes my girl. Think of babies: they get to know the world thanks to their touch. When you look at the hands of older people, they tell more about their lives than any other part of the body. Everything that is made by hand, so it is said, is made with the heart because it really is like this: hands and heart are connected. Think of lovers: When their hands touch, they love each other in the most sublime way.” “My hands grandma… how long since I used them like that!” “Move them my love, start creating with them and everything in you will move. The pain will not pass away. But it will be the best masterpiece. And it won’t hurt as much anymore, because you managed to embroider your Essence.”~Elena Barnabé S

Gardening season is coming. What do you like to do with your hands?

Love,

Mary

A Brick on the Head.

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I am back at it. I was committed to blogging every month. I was consistent through November. December was a doozey of a month, with a brick on the head wake up call. I know I have been putting it off, because I am not sure what to share. I decided I just need to start. I went back and looked at my journal. I was feeling a lot of stress the past few months. I was agitated much of the time and not sleeping well. I just kept pushing to get things done. What I needed to do was stop and slow down. A part of me feels accomplished by getting so much done. I also felt resentful about having to do so much. Back to my brick on the head wake up call. My son Tom and I were driving to church on a beautiful Sunday December morning. I dropped off homemade sourdough bagels at my friend’s house. We were driving down her street at 25 mph when a kid pulled out of the Walgreen’s parking lot and hit us. The car spun around, the air bags blew and I was yelling the whole time. Apparently, that is how I respond in a crisis. We were fine, no one was hurt but my beautiful Honda CRV, was totaled. So, so Sad. I loved that car!

I thought I was handling the accident well. I was grateful that no one was hurt. At the same time, I felt like crying. I was so sad about my car. Christmas Eve was the topper. We went to my niece’s house for Christmas Eve dinner. We got home that night, and around 10 pm, I was having a nose bleed. I got it to stop. I went to bed and woke up at 1 am with blood on the sheets and my nose was bleeding again. This time, I couldn’t get it to stop. I was starting to panic. Dan, my husband googled how to stop a nosebleed and we decided I better go to the Emergency Room. Dan went upstairs to get Thomas, our special needs son, up. I was laying on the couch in the den. I decided to get up and I went by the front door. I was starting to pass out. I could feel the right side of my face and neck tightening up. I am thinking I am having a stroke. I started yelling call 911, I’m having a stroke. I managed to get myself back on the couch. I felt much better. Meanwhile, our neighbor who is an EMT is at my door. 2 Little Silver police officers, a Little Silver ambulance and the paramedics showed up. They checked my vitals, and they made me smile to see if both sides of my mouth went up. I wasn’t having a stroke just a full blown panic attack. In the middle of all this, my nosebleed stopped. I haven’t had one since.

The incident reminded me that I need to slow down and refocus on taking really good care of myself. I am doing Wim Hoff breathing and meditating daily. I take a cold bath or shower 3-4 times a week. I put myself in therapy. I am feeling better. I notice when I start feeling agitated and I do my best to stop. I also bought a new car which I love. It took about a month to find. It is a beautiful black 2021 Acura RDX with 26,000 miles on it. We bought it off the auction which was very exciting. I joined the car wash club. I am taking great care of myself and my car. It feels important.

Thanks for reading.

Love,

Mary

My Acura drawing looks like a VW Bus, which would be fun too!

November

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“I tell you about my Dad to tell you that the reality that there are tens of millions of people who do not find character and integrity and truth telling to be basic requirements for elected public service is absolutely insane to me.” Rob Bell

It has been a rough month since the election. I have focused on taking really good care of myself. I want to have a calm nervous system. I signed up for an online Illustrative Figures course, and started drawing with colored pencils. Art therapy is a real thing. It has been helpful to spend quiet time drawing. I search for a quote that goes with the sketch. It has been fun and I will keep on practicing.

I am also plunging twice a week with the Plungettes. The ocean is 53 degrees. The water has been calm and beautiful. Our goal is 11 minutes a week. Plunging is a challenge and always makes me feel better.

I am back drinking my coffee with butter, MCT oil, plus a scoop of collagen. I am focusing on getting enough protein. I am working on cutting down on my alcohol intake which is never easy. I am tired of thinking about it. I know it is not good for me, but it is such a nice way to end the day. I do feel better with less.

I had a mammogram, a CT scan for my Calcium score and my eye lasered. All is well. I am happy to check all of that off my list!

Now, on to peace and joy for the Holidays. Enjoy it, focus on feeling your best!

Love,

Mary

"To plant a garden is to believe in tomorrow." -Audrey Hepburn

“To plant a garden is to believe in tomorrow.” Audrey Hepburn

October

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Puttering: Puttering brings me joy. Two weeks ago,I wrote in my journal, I vacuumed, dusted and put the pumpkin pillow on the wicker chair sitting in the kitchen entrance. Very satisfying. It is such an October thing to do. Many days I have puttering on my to-do list.

Running and OutdoorFit: This is a spectacular time of year to be running in the woods. We have had cool crisp mornings with beautiful fall foliage. I have been running twice a week with my friend Dorian. I am proud to say, I am in much better shape than I was last year. I don’t spend the rest of the day feeling so fatigued. It is quite an accomplishment for me. We are doing 6 weeks of HIIT at OutdoorFit! We are on our 5th week. The ladies have increased their weights and the intensity. They are seeing results.

Cold Plunging: The cold plunge training season has started. The water is 60 degrees. I have to start training in October so my body will adjust to the colder temperatures ahead. I must say, I am feeling a bit wimpy about it this year. The plungettes and I are shooting for twice a week.

Tap Class: I am working on my tapping. It is still very humbling. I haven’t found the joy in it yet. There are moments when I feel the rhythm in my body. I just think I should be able to do it. I will carry on…practice, practice, practice.

Happy Anniversary: Dan and I celebrated our 47th wedding anniversary! We actually went away for the night. We had a good friend spend the night with Thomas and Sophie. We went to the Grounds for Sculpture which was amazing. We stayed at the Lamberville Station Hotel and I had shrimp, scallops and lobster risotto for dinner. It was lovely.

Gardening: We took out the Red Bud tree in the front yard. It sadly was slowly dying. I am happy to have opened up the space. The fall is a great time to plant bargains from the local nursery. I bought 3 white cone flower plants for 70% off. I am working on making the garden more self sufficient. It is nice to have hardy perennials that will come back and take care of themselves.

Books: I am reading The Great Alone by Kristin Hannah.

I hope you have had a beautiful October.

Love,

Mary

September

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REFINISHED FLOORS: I have been wanting to refinish our floors for years. We have been living in our house for 41 years, and the floors needed to be refinished. Most of the floors were golden oak, but the stairs and one bedroom were dark . I wanted everything to match. I went with Natural to go with the shades of white on the walls. It is very pretty and soothing.

CLEANED OUT THE GARAGE AND CLOSETS: We had to put our furniture in the garage and basement in order to refinish the floors. I am being very mindful as to what is coming back in. I love a minimal look and it is so much easier to keep clean. I bought a Norwek Mop to keep the floors clean. I am mopping the kitchen and den area every night before bed. I love our lighter house, keeping it clean and less cluttered. Is puttering a pastime?

70TH BIRTHDAY: I had a steak dinner and carrot cake with my family. My brothers took me out to Drew’s Bistro for beer, pork chops, bacon sauerkraut, and smashed potatoes. The OutdoorFit ladies took me out for eggs benedict and French toast. It was a delicious birthday week!

RUNNING AND OUTDOORFIT: I am running twice a week in Huber woods. Three times a week, I am doing a 60 rep OutdoorFit weight training workout. My arms and shoulders feel strong when I am running. It is all quite amazing. I am at a weight that I was when I was 30.

TAP CLASS: I started tapping! I joined a beginner’s class through the park system. It is very humbling. I am not Gene Kelly yet but I am working on it!

BOOKS: I read Allison Pataki’s The Magnificent Lives Of Marjorie Post, Diane Keaton’s Fashion First and Marie Benedicts’ The First Ladies.

How was your September? What have you been working on? I would love to hear.

Love,

Mary

    Small Details

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    Every morning, I like to get up, make a cup of coffee, sit down in my corner of the couch and write in my journal. Part of me thinks this is silly and why do I bother taking the time. I noticed when I skip a day or two I miss it. It helps ground me and gives focus to my day.

    Yesterday, I finished writing and I randomly opened up to March 6th. This is what I wrote. “I want to write short daily blog posts, short videos, daily habits, events, enjoying simplicity.” I have not posted in 2 months.

    I love the small details in people’s lives. Perhaps, my details might inspire you.

    Do you like to journal in the morning with a cup of coffee?

    Mary

    Integrity-Love-Simplicity

    I felt like a kid again!

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    Today, I ran in the woods at noon time in the drizzle. I am thrilled to be back on the trails after falling and hurting my shoulder in July. I started running with my friend, Dorian last March. Dorian told me that today was the best run I had since I started with her. That was high praise coming from her! A few weeks ago, she told me that I looked like a decrepit old lady running up the hill. Today felt like the good ol’ days of running in the rain and the mud.

    Our goal is to break the national record for the mile in our age group. I don’t know if I will ever get there. I do know I am in much better shape then I was a year ago.

    I will take it…Progress!